A Night on the Town

A few weeks ago, I received a text from my friend Carrie Beth asking if I wanted to go with her to "Motown" the musical last night. My initial reaction was, thanks but no thanks. Thankfully, I paused to think about it before sending an immediate response. 

Since Ella was born, my life has completely revolved around her. Feeding her, cleaning her, entertaining her, teaching her, loving her... it is all consuming. I didn't notice what I was doing to myself. 

After thinking about the invitation a little more, I decided to accept and head out for a night on the town with my dear friend. We went to dinner before the show to one of my favorite downtown restaurants, Jazz, and then enjoyed the vibrant music at the show with the rest of the lively crowd. The whole night was so wonderful, I couldn't thank Carrie Beth enough for the invitation.  

Reflecting on this experience this morning, I now see what I have failed at in the last 9 months when it comes to my self-care and nurturing my friendships. I am embarrassed to admit that it took my friend's initiative to get me to my first play since before Ella was born. After a quick review of my text history, I realized that it had also been months since initiating a conversation with my dear friend, who was also one of my bridesmaids. I felt like such a bad friend. 

But, I am trying to give myself grace. I have had tunnel vision since becoming a mother. And I know it can happen whenever anyone faces a huge change in their life.  

As an introvert, I know I am prone to retreat into myself instead of reach out to others when things get difficult or uncertain. However, I know this can make the people I love feel rejected or unwanted. I need to find a better balance so as to take care of both myself and those that I love. Ah, the joys of continual growth. 

Do me a favor, and if you have a friend who is going through some big changes and seems to not be reaching out for your friendship as much as you would like - try not to be offended - and instead, reach out to them. They may not realize what they are doing. I am so grateful for friends like Carrie Beth who help me out and don't give up on me! 

Thank you for the wonderful night out, Carrie Beth!